The Gears of a Story

Many times when I was young, I can remember not knowing how to communicate to my parents why I did or said something. One time, I put into words how I felt and left a letter on the counter. I remember feeling extremely bare, like I just left a suitcase of myself open to the world. In reality, only my parents saw the letter and the issue was fixed the next day. The first time I wrote this out the document was deleted. I think I just need to take this as a challenge to make an even better explanation as to why this blog exists. This is my letter on the counter.

Like the start of acting out any great idea, there will never be one reason playing into the execution. The creation of an idea can be a story within itself. The story has many working parts like the gears in a clock, working together to tell time.

For Christmas, my dad bought me an iPad. I love that thing. I bought ebooks, games and adobe photoshop. My boyfriend was not able to be with me during Christmas break. Naturally, I photoshopped him into a picture using the iPad. I realized that WordPress was easy to use on the iPad and started to play around with the app. Because my dad bought me an iPad, the gears started to turn, as I started to think about writing a blog.

Two events worked perfectly together to form the story of my idea. My boyfriend and I had little in common. I mean, the very color of our skin was different. Once he told me “I just want to read books and play basketball.” I usually don’t want to do either of those things. I jokingly asked him if I started a fashion Instagram account would he want to be on it. Surprisingly, he liked the idea. I started to think about writing on our differences, the challenges of being a mix couple and was playing around with the name of the account. The clock started to tick… was it a clock… or a ticking time bomb?

I have always loved painting. I just enjoy colors. I enjoy adding color until I feel a piece is complete. This is the same with fashion. I keep adding until it is complete. I never take away I always add onto what I have already. An artist who does not paint realism will be asked the question, “Hey, why did you paint that a different color?” I started painting in one color scheme. All shades of yellow for one painting. When someone said “Why yellow?” or “It doesn’t look like a skyline.” I felt so misunderstood. I wanted to create. What is the fun in copying something only God can create? Why not use the creativity He gave me and make something new. The more I was asked those questions, the more color I wanted to add. The gears were turning.

When the last semester of my senior year started in January, the week was a whirl wind. My boyfriend was no where to be found. I was having dinner with a friend and told my boyfriend he should join us. He came late, like he usually did. We started to talk about the future since both my friend and I were graduating. I jokingly said, “I am just going to drop out and become an artist” (I joke about stuff I actually want to do… I should stop that). To which my boyfriend said laughingly, but was partially serious, “If you do I will break up with you”. I wanted to paint even more. It was almost like a box of color was just waiting to explode. It just happened to fit with the title of the Instagram account I had already started. Because my boyfriend didn’t want me to become an artist, I decided on the name: TheFullColorLife.

I was still really excited about starting an Instagram with him. Among the craziness, I started our Instagram about fashion. I know… what a dumb idea… Exactly a week later my boyfriend told me he had started talking to another girl while we were dating. Then- no more boyfriend. I am thankful he didn’t drag me along longer and I adopted a phrase my roommate who says “life happens”. Because my boyfriend started to talk to another girl, I decided to take a step further and start a blog on WordPress called TheFullColorLife.

Creativity, something God used to shape and give to humanity. Painting. Creating. There is something healing in the formula to being creative. I create because I was made to. Creating is taking what you experience and expressing it. {Experience} + {Experience} = Expression. Creativity is the ability to take life and make something of it.

After graduating from undergraduate school, I realized something. I have no idea what I want to do next. The next step in life is a blank piece of canvas. I started this blog to write the story. To tell how the gears of an idea started and how it will keep going. The people I come in contact with are the paint. They are the gears forming the story of an idea. A gift from God. Because my dad bought me an ipad, my boyfriend found another girl and I have no idea what to do next, I started a blog. This is my letter on the counter.

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